Happy Valentines day beautiful people! A couple of you hoped that my relationship status would change by this time in 2020, rather I remained single, and I am pretty fine with it. Valentines day can be overwhelming and this year it happens to fall on a Friday (group hugs) we are all in this together. Well every year, I try to compile a singles guide on how to spend valentines day here, here, here and here as an opportunity to connect with other singles like me.
I believe being single teaches you how you want to be loved, if you are open or intentional about it.
It is also imperative to mention at this point that being single isn’t necessarily elite status, people should and can seek out means to be in a loving committed relationship. There are days when I daydream of skipping on a walkway with someone, reading a book, creating art, writing poems for and to someone special to feel zen. Since that time is neither close nor far, I try to appreciate the current state I am in. So here are a few guides to spending Valentines day as a single person:
No Expectations: Tucked somewhere at the back of your mind, may exist this faint idea that someone on Valentines day will show up bearing good tidings, in cash, kind, or gifts. There are single people who keep platonic relationships, or friends with benefit and believe that things will morph into something special on valentines day, but as Nigerians will say, please dead that idea. The earlier you reconcile the possibility of this not happening, the easier it is to deal with any possible outcome.
Wear Red and Feel the Love: I chuckled at this idea because it is my hope that everyone reading this post, realize that they are loved regardless-plus I love you (that should be enough right?). I try to adorn myself in red every year, since its a generic color used to celebrate Valentines day. Also, it makes you not feel left out of the celebration, since its the color rule for that day (with exception of individuals living in Washington, DC). People who live in DC will rather be shot to oblivion than wear color.
Get Yourself a Gift: If you are buoyant enough, you can order flowers to your house, throw petals on the floor, buy a cocktail wine, dress in a lingerie and dance to John Legend. I believe being single teaches you how you want to be loved, if you are open or intentional about it. The ability to treat yourself to peak enjoyment status only sets the standard for how you want to be treated.
Watch a Refreshing Online Content Addressing Single-hood: I do believe at the end of the day people seek out companionship, on Valentines day. One way to guide your understanding on how to get a mate or partner next year, may be to listen to experts or like-minded folks who are on the same journey with you. For example, I recently stumbled on this Christian Ted talk by Joseph Solomon. The talk followed a humorist approach to addressing some of the misconceptions about church folks in what he referred to as a disease called ‘singleness,’ which I felt was a beautiful approach to the generic content we see online.
Visit a Life Band: I am a big fan of Jazz, and although on Valentines day I’ll be cooking, I advice that people visit or attend life bands or a shows, opening themselves up to meeting people or someone with like-minded interest. The luck may be in your stars and you may find someone who is interesting enough to share memories with.
Shoot Your Shot: I can advice that in the age of social media, where people are less likely to meet their partners in natural life settings, shooting your shot may just land you the person of your dreams. It will or may end in tears, but oh well, you tried innit.
One last point that isn’t really a point is, task your friends, to get you gifts so you can feel special too. I hope you enjoy valentines day and leave a comment below on what you are likely to do on that day.
Shoe: Marc Jacobs
Purse: Emilio Pucci