Love in the Time of Conscious Consumption: A Valentine’s Day Guide for the Modern Romantic

There’s something delightfully subversive about reimagining Valentine’s Day in an era where we are all questioning our relationship with consumption. As an Igbo woman who appreciates both grand gestures and financial wisdom (yes, we contain multitudes), I’ve watched my approach to this event evolve. And unlike previous years where I wrote singles guides spending celebrating Valentines day—today, we’re diving into something different.

For those navigating love in 2025, whether you’re embracing a no-buy year or simply seeking more meaningful ways to celebrate, here’s my guide to making February 14th memorable without surrendering to capitalism’s siren song. Well, mostly—some of us still believe in strategic splurging.

Create a Sonic Love Letter

There’s an intimate art to curating a playlist that tells a story, shares a sentiment, or conveys a message. It could be the song that played during your first dance, or a song y’all immediately nodded to in agreement when it came on CarPlay. The beauty lies in the narrative—Deciding to send a message with the first letter of each song when words fail. *cues in “The Weeknd.”

Fun Q&A Couple Questions

As Teen Vogue rightly opined, intimacy is built by asking questions whether you are looking to establish or evolve your relationship. They have also curated 145 questions that— most of which I endorse. The key is creating a space where vulnerability feels like an adventure rather than a risk. Set the scene, by pouring your favorite drinks, dim the lights, and prepare to be surprised by someone you thought you knew completely.

A Short Road Trip for an Impromptu Adventure

There’s something magical about looking on google maps, pointing to a spot, unplanned, and simply going. You both pack a snack, create a road trip playlist (different from your love songs compilation, mind you), and head out for a brief adventure. The good thing is that Valentines falls on a weekend this year, so there is enough time to explore and go back home to refresh or rest. More importantly, the destination matters less than the conversations that unfold when you’re both watching the world scroll past your windows.

Embrace the Cliché

The world is not ending- but yes, I’m advocating for flowers and chocolates—but with intention. Walk into a flower shop and it can be trader joes, hand pick flowers that speak to your significant other. Get him his favorite bottle of wine, and enjoy each other’s company. Sometimes the most conventional gestures, when personalized, become revolutionary acts of love. Which brings me to my last point…

Cook Together

Choose a recipe that challenges you both—perhaps that pasta dish from culinary wars, or an ambitious attempt at recreating your partner’s grandmother’s secret recipe. The mess, the mistakes, the eventual triumph—it’s all part of the story you’re writing together.

So this Valentine’s Day, whether you’re planning an elaborate surprise or a quiet evening in, remember that the most valuable currency in love has always been attention. In a world trying to commodify every emotion, choosing to be present—truly, fully present—might be the most radical act of love we can offer. It’s up to you now to make today count but which tips will I be following today?

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